sexy Pattaya

Posted from Pattaya, Chon Buri, Thailand.

Welcome to the seaside city of Pattaya.

Welcome to the seaside city of Pattaya.

After diving on Koh Tao I decided to head back up to Bangkok for a few days to do some shopping I neglected to do two weeks before and spend some more time with my friend. Plus, since she has weekends off, we decided we would head to Pattaya for the weekend.

I had heard Pattaya is the sex-tourism capital of Thailand. Actually, I’d heard that Thailand was the sex-tourism capital of the world, as in if you want it, you’ll find it in Thailand. So I really didn’t know what to expect when I got to Pattaya. Was it gonna be a city gone mad with naked brothels? Would I see old men making out with far-too young – she could be your grand-daughter, dude – girls in alleys? Would I get propositioned for a three or four way by some sex-tourist who has completely blurred the lines between his vacation bubble and mine?  I can’t really vouch for the city as I have never paid for sex and I wasn’t about to start that tradition here, but what I will say is Pattaya wasn’t all that bad, it just isn’t a place I’d like to take my lover to on holiday. I doubt the relationship would last.

But let me start from the beginning. I had never been to Pattaya and neither had my friend. I had heard about it and basically all I heard is it’s the land where old western men can find young Thai girlfriends. I thought I saw a lot of that in Chiang Mai, but people said Pattaya was that magnified. I saw a ping-pong show in Patong, but apparently nothing was off limits in Pattaya. And what about the girlie bars on Koh Samui? Nope. Pattaya would blow them away.

As I mentioned, proving all of this didn’t appeal to me, but being that there is a sadistic voyeur hidden deep within me, I kinda wanted to see this. I also have to point out that I did go for another reason. I saw this tourism article that highlighted a temple or building or shrine, something, called the Sanctuary of Truth and I figured, why not? It’s on the way to Trat, the city I need to catch the ferry to Koh Mak from, and I hadn’t gone to see a single temple this trip. I mean, that’s what one does in Thailand, right?

Getting there

The weekend traffic to Pattaya is a bit intense, even on a six-lane (or often eight-lane) highway.

The weekend traffic to Pattaya is a bit intense, even on a six-lane (or often eight-lane) highway.

My friend decided she didn’t want to take a minivan, despite how cheap they were (97 – 150B) or how frequent they came. And she didn’t want to take the bus (130B.) Instead, she found a taxi driver to take us for 1,500B (split three ways) and he paid the tolls. It was only about two and half hours to Pattaya with the tolls and weekend traffic, and our driver dropped us off at the lane to our hotel, The Sunshine Hotel and Residence, on Soi 8.

the heart of the action

Walking down our soi on our way to the hotel. It was early in the night.

Walking down our soi on our way to the hotel. It was early in the night.

At first glance walking up our street many of the ladies, I mean, Kathoeys, stared us three ladies down. Were we competition? Or were we just too female? Were people wondering what three beautiful ladies were doing in the sex-tourism capital of Thailand? It was at this point we all smiled. We were in the heart of the action and that’s precisely where we wanted to be for an authentic Pattaya experience, apart from hiring a date.

I don’t think a single lady in any of the bars on our alley was an actual female. Strong jaw bones. No hips. Broad shoulders.

Anyway. We checked in, got some food on the beach, had a swim in one of the three pools at our hotel, watched men come and go with escorts, and then decided to go to the Sanctuary. My friends both work in travel in Bangkok, so they were quick to book a song taew for 100B to take us direct to the Sanctuary. A taxi wanted 600B return. That’s $20. Um. No.

The song taews are 20B up and down the roads. They are far cheaper than any tuktuk, motorbike taxi or regular taxi. To be fair, the sanctuary is only a 15 min walk up the side streets from the main road, but 100B isn’t much.

If you go to Pattaya, do set a couple of hours aside to go to the Sanctuary of Truth. You won’t regret it.

IMG_0385

When we returned we decided to head to Walking Street. A 20B song taew ride and we began our parade down the infamous gogo bar, massage parlour, escort service, hidden hotel fiasco that is Walking Street. It was amazing, shocking and hilarious. Once we figured out how to navigate the inane amount of Chinese tour groups and the odd man who couldn’t distinguish who is a working girl and who is a spectator we were quite enchanted with this weird little town.

I thought I took better photos, but it turns out that I didn't get too much. These, I'm pretty sure, were girls.

I thought I took better photos, but it turns out that I didn’t get too much. These, I’m pretty sure, were girls.

I'm not certain about this one.

I’m not certain about this one.

I must also mention, that I’m sober. The ladies I was with were drinking which made for an even more interesting experience. After we ate, did our amateur voyeurism and judged our fair share of spectacles, we decided to head over to the other main road.

BoyzTown. Nuff said.

BoyzTown. Nuff said.

Off the Second Road one can find the very gay districts with BoyzTown and in places like Soi 8, where we were staying, what I will call KathoeyTown.

The one thing us three ladies kept marveling at was how people spend a whole week in this city when you can see it all in a day. Of course, we know how. Oh. We know.

The next day my friends took the bus back to Bangkok and I continued onto Trat in a round about fashion, and ultimately onto Koh Mak.

My opinion of Pattaya is you should experience it. But if you’re the jealous type, do not go with someone you are in a relationship with. Is it the sex-tourism capital? I couldn’t tell you. But I’m sure there’s people out there who can answer that question far better than me.

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